4 Tips for Transforming Your Relationship
Have you been with your partner a while and things are just becoming a bit stagnant? Maybe you’re taking each other for granted? Or maybe you find yourself in a rut, where you’re continuously fighting without really knowing why. Whatever’s going on, investing a little time into improving your relationship can make a big difference in your quality of life. Here are my top 4 tips for transforming your relationship:
1. Don’t Keep a Scoreboard
There’s nothing worse than keeping track in a relationship. If you live with you partner, it can be very easy to fall into a mental habit of tallying how much they do around the home, versus how much you do. A relationship shouldn’t be a competition, and if that’s the way yours is then you’re headed for trouble. Instead, you should both be contributing to ensure things work as well as possible. If you really feel things are imbalanced, instead of bringing them up in the middle of the fight sit down and figure out a way to share the load. Chances are your partner is doing lots of things that you haven’t quite noticed, and if not a calm chat is going to be more motivating than hurling demands in a heated argument.
2. Continue to Date Each Other
If we continued treating our partners the same way we did at the beginning when everything was new and exciting, I’m sure many of us would never have the relationship issues we find ourselves experiencing. Routine can be a big factor in us taking out partners for granted, it can be so easy to get lost in the daily grind and to stop and appreciate how special they are. Setting up regular dates, whether it’s once a week or every fortnight, to go out and do something fun together is so crucial for enjoying your relationship. If you’re stuck in quarantine at the moment, you can come up with fun date night ideas at home. Whether it’s a night playing board games, or an evening spent cooking a special meal together by candle light. Continue to make each other a priority and invest in quality time together.
3. Keep the Intimacy Alive
With all the changes we go through in life, from work stress to adding children into the mix, it can be hard to find the time or energy for intimacy, but it’s such an important part of the relationship. It doesn’t have to be just about sex, simple things like kissing your partner before they leave each day, a long embrace when you’ve not seen them in a while and brushing your hand across their arm as you walk past are easy ways to add intimacy into your day. Sex is important, too, and getting creative in the bedroom with toys such as dildos can help bring a little more spice back into your lives.
4. Take Time to Listen to Them
One thing I’ve noticed a lot of my friends mention about their relationship, is that they’re really longing to be heard. Life is so busy and it’s so easy to be constantly distracted by the beep of our watches, or the vibration on our phones, that deep connection is becoming a bit scarce at the moment. Take some time to properly listen to how your partner’s day went, ask them about how they’re feeling about the political situation right now, and even ask their advice and opinion on things you’re not sure about. Connecting as much as you can through conversation is a wonderful way to improve the depth of your relationship and to ensure your relationship is as strong as it can be.
Relationships can be a bit of work, but they’re worth it. Hopefully these four tips help you transform your relationship and ensure it’s reaching its potential.